Monday, May 6, 2013

to be completed, some title about iraqis


The American-led invasion of Iraq, which began March 19, 2003, has had innumerable consequences for both Americans and Iraqis over the last ten years. The conflict that caused between 112,295-122,852 civilian deaths has largely been forgotten in the United States.

Tangible repercussions, besides the ongoing threat of terrorism reported almost daily by major media outlets, seem to exist only in Iraq, where the once “poor but simple” lifestyle has been violently transformed into one of fear and constant conflict.

Acknowledgement of the horrors of the nearly decade-long Iraq War ended once the last American troops were pulled out in mid-December 2011. Even before their departure a power vacuum was created, and as a cause brutal and rampant sectarian violence has crippled the Iraqi way of life.

But what about those who lived through the conflict?

Ahmed, Hasim, and Amr live together in a small three-bedroom apartment. The three of them are part of the 40 Iraqi students studying in Michigan this year. They share a small living room and a smaller kitchen in which they cook almost all of their meals together. They often sit on their floor, feet folded, and joke as they listen to music or play with their cell phones, sometimes snapping pictures of each other or their guests. Their modest home is warm and simple, just like traditional Arab hospitality would dictate. Their television, which is almost never turned on, also sits on the floor, largely ignored by those who visit.

Their house, like their country once was, is unique in its makeup. Ahmed and Amr, who are both from Anbar province, are Sunni Muslims, while Hasim, from Baghdad, is a Shia. For the last ten years, they have watched their country be ripped apart at the seams, first by Coalition forces, and later by a bloody civil war between the two largest sects in Islam. Here, however, things are peaceful, things exist as they once did, during a long-forgotten time in a place far from their present home.

Ahmed and Amr keep a strict adherence to the prayer schedule taped to their wall. Whenever they are home they pray together, and the two men always attend jummah prayers at their local mosque. They sit and nod as the imam delivers his khutbah in English

After prayers, Ahmed, the troublemaker in the apartment, can be seen in constant motion, shaking hands and exchanging salaams with his friends, kneeling down for a short period to check in with his companions, then, like a game of musical chairs, he takes off and joins another group. Amr on the other hand is almost always silent, speaking only when he is sure of what he has to say. His shyness serves as a polar opposite of Ahmed’s friendliness and his joking attitude.

Hasim is always absent when the others pray. Shias are not allowed to pray in congregation, so when Amr and Ahmed wash and get their prayer rug ready, he disappears to his room to quietly wait for them to finish. When they are done he will return, and the men will continue joking. Almost no attention is given to the differences in how they practice their religion.

It is clear from the way that the three men interact that Ahmed is the youngest. Now 24, he was a mere 14 when Coalition forces invaded his country. With a smile, one that says tenderness in any language, he recounted the his first memory of the war. “They [the Americans] bombed an apartment building with helicopters,” he said. The force threw him across the room.

From that day on, going to school was a risky endeavor. His school was a mere four blocks from his house, but due to the proximity to a government office, every street he crossed was guarded by a group of American soldiers. Ahmed reports that the soldiers would shoot indiscriminately at those who would pass, killing students and teachers alike. He said that during the worst years of the occupation, three of his teachers were killed by American soldiers and he had to change schools three times. His neighbor, a metalworker, would often pick up dead bodies from the streets, risking his life to provide a proper burial for the fallen.

At night, he says, the soldiers guarding the government offices would get drunk and fire their weapons down the streets. Ahmed laughed as he told me about the soccer matches he would play in the relative safety of his neighborhood as the crackling gunfire would tear through the calm of night.

Amr has similar stories, although he frequently chooses to nod along to Ahmed’s instead of telling his own. The 30 year-old Fallujah native is most comfortable sharing his experiences in his native Arabic, which are met with nods of approval from his counterparts and, for the most part, are not translated.

Fallujah saw some of the worst fighting of the war. In 2004, the US attempted to capture the city after a series of brutal murders of both Blackwater contractors and US Marines. On April 1 of that year, the deputy director of US military operations in Iraq claimed that the Marines “will pacify that city,” and three days later 2000 troops encircled Fallujah. Late that night the attack began, but it took only two days for American military command to announce that Marines would not try to capture the city center. At one point Marines played AC/DC and Metallica over loudspeakers to try to anger insurgents enough to bring them out into the open for snipers. Those snipers averaged 31 kills each during the battles of overtake Fallujah.

Amr smiles less than Hasim and Ahmed. He is cautious with his words and unlike the others he listens more than he speaks. He was 20 and studying in a local university when Americans invaded. For three months classes were cancelled, then finally he was able to return to school. Iraqis believe that education is of primary importance, and just like Hasim he risked his life to continue his studies.

Hasim seems to have lost faith in his religion after witnessing the pervasive violence that the civil war created. Ahmed once noted that Sunnis arrested by the Americans would be given to the Shia government, where they would be tortured with drills.

Horror stories eventually make way for hope, though. All three of the men plan on returning to Iraq as soon as they receive their degrees from Western Michigan University. Although Ahmed lost between 40 and 50 family members, neighbors and friends to the violence that ravaged his country, he says he could never leave Iraq. Hasim, who is at moderate risk as a Shia in Baghdad feels the same way.

9 comments:

  1. I couldn't wait to keep reading your piece from the moment that I started it. I think you provide a perspective that I have never read in any other media outlet-- that is, that of a group of peaceful civilians living in Iraq during the invasion. The closest thing I can think of to the style of your story would be "The Good Soldiers" by David Finkel. Finkel humanizes the soldiers and gives them a face that we do not usually see in the mainstream media. I think that you are doing this well from the perspective of three Iraqi civilians. I have no major critiques of your piece at this point. Perhaps it would be interesting to know how they feel living in the country that is responsible for the invasion of Iraq during a war that caused so many civilian deaths. Great job and I can't wait to talk more in class!

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  2. "Hasim seems to have lost faith in his religion after witnessing the pervasive violence that the civil war created. Ahmed once noted that Sunnis arrested by the Americans would be given to the Shia government, where they would be tortured with drills."

    I realize these are things that show why he would have lost his faith, but you aren't showing us as to what is tipping you off to this. What is he doing that makes it seem that his faith is lost? Does he not pray with as much rigor or something like it? How do you know--or how does the reader know--that these stories for the most part aren't being translated other then you just telling us?

    I think your topic is really strong, and has a possibility for a lot of nuance, and I think it'd be really strong if we were to hear those jokes or see their shyness. Your setup is also an interesting one, and an approach of them being the ones left is a great entry way into these individuals.

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  3. This is an intense and sensitive subject, your writing definitely gave it the necessary respect it needed. These young men have amazing stories and I'm sure there was a lot to pick from to write about. I really liked the way you characterized each man, and compared their temperaments to one another. One of my favorite parts was when you described how the one man respectfully leaves for prayers and then returns when the other two are finished. Do you think he resents this, or is religious difference not even worried about even though the two groups are feuding in their home country?

    I think something that will really help your piece is to find one aspect to focus on about their stories. The narrative of their lives could fill an entire book, or more, I'm sure so I bet that will be slightly difficult. I don't feel like the story was about them dealing with being in America, I kind of wanted the focus to be on how they interact with each other or something...not sure.

    There's so much good material in here that I'm sure your final piece will be incredibly interesting. Thanks for sharing!

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  4. Hey Chandler,

    I understand your frustration and aspirations to really do this story justice, and how those thoughts can be dominating over the actual practice of writing it.

    generally speaking, after reading this, I found myself fixated and most interested in the details of every day life. I was a little thrown off in the beginning with the introduction and broad newscast context for the stories that are so personal. I love the parts about their lives back in Iraq and the lives they have here. What if you drew parallels between those narratives (contrasting them) and then pulling the overall implication and conflict/irony at the end? Especially that the ROTC program at Western is so big! that could be an interesting detail to include. I think this is great for a first draft and it will come through as you work it more.

    See you tomorrow,
    Charlotte

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  5. Greetings Chandler,

    This is a truly excellent piece. Right from the get go you establish what you're writing about and why you're writing it. The change in set-up, historical rather than physical description, is refreshing as hell. Hats off to you. While I'm on that subject, I actually enjoyed the overall lack of physical description of the characters. In a unique way it kept race out of the piece which helped establish the pieces focus. That is the mark of a truly skilled writer. I think the real key in this piece is that you are very passionate about your subject matter.

    I thought it was a bold task to choose to profile three instead of just one and you by in large handled it really well, I just think the second and third to last paragraphs could be better developed. I also feel at times your voice was a little inconsistant but that is a point that is easier expressed in person (in workshop tonight)

    See you then.

    Thanks

    Woody

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  6. I think you write much better about things you care about. You're painting a very vivid picture here, and you're explaining things that I wouldn't necessarily understand in a concise, cohesive way. There are a couple of points where I wonder whether you've over-simplified, but I'm interested to see what the group feels about that.

    It's, again, clear that you've really done a lot of great reporting. It helps that you've developed these relationships with these people. They're developed so clearly through their interactions with each other and through little details. Very impressive. I dig this.

    SEE YA

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  7. A very interesting peak into Muslim-American life in Michigan. I just read a heartbreaking piece this morning about a Afghani (Muslim) woman (a physician) who was harshly treated at the White House Correspondents dinner (a bit unrelated), but this in-depth piece is making Muslims in a America a trend in my day today. I have to say I'm quite pleased.

    I really enjoyed the history bit at the beginning (another personal note), I hosted an Iraqi exchange-student in high school for 2 weeks, and this was a good reminder. I would love to perhaps see a switch in the introduction of the men/ this history piece. I was very drawn in by both, but I think you could interlude after the bit about school with some of this background information.

    Also, I really like some of the details of prayer, but I think the average reader needs a bit more information. As Woody told me about my Senegal piece, he knew some of my experiences in Africa as a white person, but the average reader needs way more information. Tell them about the 5 prayer times. Why do we need a schedule? What is the jummah prayer? I might get some of this, but not everyone will, and it could be really crucial and cool to give that little extra peak into their lives.

    See you in class.

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  8. Your tenderness and passion shine through beautifully in this draft. I know all too well that pressure to do a story justice. It can be crippling.

    What's working best here is the intimate look at the lives of these three men. I long for physical descriptions, however, as well as some direct quotes (even if they need to be in translation). Do you have the material to craft more clearly delineated scenes?

    Also, I think you'll best serve the story to begin with the men's present--and where the story demands it, step back and give background on the war (like you did moving from the graf "Amr has similar stories . . ." to "Fallujah . . . "). It's perfectly fine for you to have a distinct political point of view here, and you'll communicate it most clearly through their stories rather than knocking the reader over the head with it right off the bat.

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  9. Asshole,

    First off, the passion that you have for your subject is really amazing, and it's present in every word. These three guys are fascinating, and you're doing the story justice, for sure. The parts about them are the strongest parts about this piece.

    In fact, my main suggestion is to focus on them. As my grandmother always used to say: "write about your bros, and the political commentary will happen naturally." The part about the civilian death toll in Iraq is unnecessary because you're showing it with Amr. Once you've established a personal connection to this violence, then you can pepper in big-picture stuff to enhance your point. In this way, you can address the political via the personal, which is far more effective than numbers at fostering empathy and understanding.

    I also want more dialogue and scene in order to get a more vivid sense of who these guys are. I think that will happen naturally as you zoom in on them more.

    Anyway, I'm excited to to see how this piece turns out!

    Trevor

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